Tuesday, December 20, 2011


when she dies Brisbane will flood. She has been holding the water back with sheer will power. she is the cause of all the good things that have happened to me. when she dies everything I do will be covered in dust. I will still put in the effort but the magic will evaporate. people will not like me. they will see my meanness peeking out through the cracks in my aging skin. they will see my skill at manipulation. they will see behind the thin veneer to the lack of solid structure underneath. when she dies, I think, and I feel my chest tightening with my panic because I know the world will end. she is all that has been keeping it together and when she dies we die, you die. we all die. because when she dies it is the end.


Katherine said...
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Katherine said...

I have only ever had one granparent in my lifetime.. all the others passed on before my birth. My grandmother is 96 years of age and every second she remains with us is a blessing to all us whom love her. I understand your fear because I fear the same. I can't imagine life without her nor do I want to because like you, it saps the air from my lungs. Thinking of you!